If this day would be your last…
If this day would be your last, how would you want to be remembered? How do you think would people remember you? What legacy would you want to leave after you left?
No, no. I’m not dying. Pardon me for a very morbid and absurd opening. Do me one last favor by reading my column, and I hope that at the end of this piece you’d be able to answer these questions. I would also recommend listening to Nichole Nordeman’s song “Legacy” afterwards.
I don’t mind if you’ve got something nice to say about me
“Nagsusulat ka pa din ba sa dyaryo?” my seatmate (whom I barely know) surprisingly asked me one day in class. “Pa’no mo nalamang nagsusulat ako sa dyaryo?” I asked. “May mukha ka dun di ba? Tsaka ang galing mo eh…” Then I secretly blushed at the compliment. Thanks dude!
Being in the paper for years have exposed me to a vast array of people with a colorful variety of responses to what I’ve written. Aside from hate mails and below-the-belt criticisms which I so consistently receive from faithful critics, I’ve also received several compliments from my dear readers in my years of service.
And though I enjoy an accolade like the rest, I don’t mind, really, if you’ve got something nice to say about me. “And you could take my picture and hang it in a gallery of all the who’s-who’s and so-and-so’s that used to be the best at such-and-such.” After all, human beings are forgetful beings, right?
Besides, what I’ve done as a student journalist is nothing extraordinary from what I’ve been called to do: to serve. What Napoleon did with his sword, I will do – and have faithfully done – with my pen. After I’m gone, I want to be remembered as more than just the back porch poet or the newspaper’s boy next door.
I want to make a mark. I want to leave a lasting legacy.
To make a mark on things
As a student journalist, I have always been committed in advocating policy change for the best welfare of the students. My very first column in the Blue and Silver entitled, “Guess the Title” (January-February 2006) dealt with issues regarding certain school policies on haircut and dress code along with some slip-ups on the conduct of some security personnel. I was summoned at the Office of Student Affairs back then and was told to “not lift a finger on school policies.”
I also consider myself as a headstrong advocate of campus journalism and press freedom in the campus. My longest column by far, “The Gag Show,” published in the paper’s January-February 2007 issue fearlessly criticized attempts to put “restraints” against the Blue and Silver after some administrators allegedly instigated a complaint against the publication because of our December 2006 Lampoon issue. The paper’s funds have been withheld, causing delays and difficulties in the Blue and Silver’s operations. My most recent column, “My Suicidal Note,” (January-February 2009) was an intellectual comeback against unsubstantiated and unfair accusations that “the Blue and Silver is not doing its job.” Fortunately though, I haven’t been summoned yet again to face furious administrators who have been implicated in the aforesaid column.
As a molder of public values and opinions, I also see to it that I advocate change in values within the community. “MACARTHUR: Ang Pagbabalik” (August-September 2008) was a soft satire to point up distorted PCU values and cultures which didn’t seem to change even after I was gone for a while. This marked my re-entry in the paper a year after I wrote my heartrending final column (Closing Time, March 2007) and left school. My column, “Faith, Character, Politics?” (November-December 2008) was written amidst issues and controversies which marred President Suarez’s administration late last year. It was a jolting reminder that PCU is a Christian University and that it must go back to its driving maxim: Faith, Character, Service. Because we are Christians, not politicians.
I may not be as brilliant as Dr. Jose Rizal to be remembered as a national hero or to qualify as a promising propagandist who practically changed the way Filipinos live. I may not be as well-loved as Tita Cory who vigilantly protected democracy until her final breath. I may not be as fearless as Conrado De Quiros, nor am I as good as Armando Doronilla. But I have the same heart as theirs which beats for truth and freedom.
These are what I’ve fought for – on which I want to make a mark. I will continue writing and will not let the ink of my pen dry up, for this very same ink runs in my veins. May this ink – my passion for truth and service – leave a mark in the public whom I have served and in everyone around me. I will continue serving the students from the back seat. Real servants don’t need the spotlight to serve after all.
But if people would eventually forget my name or my mere existence just as how forgetful human beings always tend to be, it wouldn’t matter. I’m not after the recognition either. I will find solace in seeing everything which I protected and fought for to the bitter end still evident and still being protected, not just by the Blue and Silver but by every student who desires quality education and by every administrator who longs for change and unity.
I want to leave a legacy
Here is an inventory of how I want to be remembered after I’m gone:
I want to be remembered as a student journalist who, once in the history of the Blue and Silver, has fearlessly fought for campus press freedom and responsible campus journalism.
I want to be remembered as a student leader who, through the ink of my pen, has protected the best interest of the students through my writings while risking my own comfort and protection just to deliver the truth and to fight for what the students need to know.
I want to be remembered as a mentor who eagerly trained and transferred everything I know to my apprentices without reservation.
I want to be remembered as a student who was always willing to learn more; who is humble enough to admit that I still have so much to learn and that I still fail and commit mistakes because heck, I’m human.
I want to be remembered as a friend who loved at all times; a lover who gets hurt, yet still chooses to love even more; a child who dreamt for a brighter future for the family; and a penniless writer who tried to impact the lives of his readers by what he writes.
I want to be remembered as a child of mercy and grace who blessed His name unapologetically.
I want to leave that kind of lasting legacy.
Mi Ultimo Adios
The Blue and Silver is turning 60 this year. Many people have been where I am and have also fought for the same cause which I’ve fought for. Thinking about how old this institution already is gives me Goosebumps. It’s just overwhelming to note that I belong to an institution which is actually older than my parents.
The Blue and Silver’s legacy is about scrupulously ferreting out the truth and responsibly reporting it to the public. It is about having a strong passion and commitment for excellence. And as the paper presses on, it is my hope that everything will still be done under the same driving maxim: to “speak up for those who cannot speak. Protect the rights of those who are poor, helpless and needy.” (Proverbs 31:9)
I hope that this legacy will live on and will still be protected, not just by the incumbent Blue and Silver Editorial Board and Staff, but also by the countless generations who would come behind us and would be heirs of this publication which I have come to love with my entire being. May this writing reach you.
Remember my words: for the good of the service. Respect the legacy. The studentry above all else.
My years in the paper have all been worthwhile, and as my introspections will now be laid to rest, my only hope is that may the screams and pleas of my silent introspections all these years did not fall on deaf ears.
To everyone who cared and read my column; to my mentors and professors; to the friends I’ve come to know; to my friends and school supporters; to my best friends Jo Anne and Serg; to my family; to the Blue and Silver; and to the Greatest Writer and Author of my life – my deepest appreciation and gratitude to all of you.
This is my final introspection. My final farewell.
Now think. How would you want to be remembered…?
***
Published in the July-August 2009 issue of the Blue and Silver; my final column in the paper which I have served for four years.
